Married after six months dating speed dating dinner
You don’t mean to harm family, friends, coworkers, church buddies, or anyone else. Short-term consequences and long-term consequences. If you choose short-term, you may decide to end your marriage for your lover.
Your desire is (There may be an exception to that if you feel that your spouse has been unkind or hurtful. The intensity of your present emotions may make that the choice that seems most likely to make you happy.
Some are honest enough with themselves that they know step-by-step how everything came to be as it is now.
Others have more difficulty, their mind confused because what they are doing is so contrary to what they believe and value. Others blame it on their spouse’s actions or lack of actions.
Highly revered marriage researcher John Gottman writes in his book …many clinicians…have been quick to point out that ‘affairs involve sex, but sex is usually not the purpose of the affair’…In fact, most clinicians who have written in this area report that affairs are usually about seeking friendship, support, understanding, and validation…they are about getting the acceptance that is missing in the marriage.” My work with thousands of married couples in crisis indicates that this is exactly the case.Relationship affairs – as opposed to the one-night-stand type of affairs that are wholly about sex and not at all about relationship – usually find root in a person’s feeling unloved, unaccepted, disliked, or disrespected.That doesn’t mean that the person necessarily went looking for affirmation and validation from someone else.All the rest of us are flawed and at times hard to live with.Repeatedly those who left their spouses for a remarkable love come to me after a few years and say they wish they could do it all over again.